mistakes

how many mistakes do we make in life? unfortunately, many. today i made a mistake, not a big one, but still a mistake.

i sold a book through half.com and the girl asked for expedited mail, so when i went to the post office i said "expedited mail please" and the lady said that would be $17.50 (wtheck!) because expedited mail means that the person receives it the day after you send it. ...but i figured this was what the girl wanted because she was in a huge hurry to get the book, and i figured half.com would reimburse me anyways. wrong. half.com's definition of expedited mail is sending it out 1-3 days earlier than normal, so you'd have to pay like, an extra two bucks to do that. USPS' definition is ship it out as fast as humanly possible so that the person gets it the next day. so i paid an extra $12 bucks, and when i figured out my mistake an hour later, it was too late. a waste of twelve dollars...i felt like i had lost something even though twelve bucks isn't a ton of money. still, i was thinking of all that i could have done with that extra twelve dollars. MY 12 dollars. i could have bought 9 pints of halo ice cream, gotten a nice on sale shirt from gap, saved it up, and the list goes on. and all this was going through my head because i felt like it was my money. All mine. And i had a right to do whatever i wanted with it. but as i was driving back (i seem to do a lot of thinking in the car), i realized it's not my money. it's God's. He's the one that provided it. so i apologized to God for wasting his money and tried my hardest not to feel resentful that i had spent an unneeded twelve dollars.

hey and who knows? maybe like me, this girl's classes start tuesday and she HAS to have the book by then. and if she gets it monday she will be so so thankful and amazed that it came so on time. and maybe this would save her a lecture from her parents asking why yet again, her books came in late. and maybe her teacher is super strict and checks to see that everyone has their books on the first day. and after the first day, there's already a reading assignment, and thank goodness she has her book which was sent on saturday and came on monday. maybe i will make this girl very happy. or maybe she won't give it a second thought. so many maybe's...so few definitely's.

i hate losing money, but i think i have to let it go more. i think it's time to tithe tomorrow. i keep forgetting, but maybe this incident will serve as a more permanent reminder.

classes start tuesday!